Whilst ‘Most Glorious Taskmaster’ Mr N Lives is indoctrinating you into the mysterious world of pretension, I am going to play the part of ringleader:

You’re sitting anxiously amongst fellow onlookers in the bleachers hugging the walls of the giant tent where the spectacle is about to take place. The seats you’re sitting in seem to shudder and you can’t shake the feeling the wood itself is afraid for it’s life, but as the lights start to dim your attention is drawn to the center of a sandy ring where a lone shadow swims through the darkness and takes post. You can hear the figure’s leather soles crease with his changing stance. Without a moments notice and before you can protest your retinas are scorched with the old fashioned bulbs illuminating the otherworldly vista…

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